Small victories

Tonight I had plenty of excuses as to why I didn’t want to go for a run.

  • I was in a bad mood and just didn’t feel like it.
  • It’s Monday, ugh.
  • The weather was gross. Super humid and misty rain.
  • What difference does a day make anyway?!

As soon as I got home from work I put on my workout clothes so that it would be a little harder to say no.  I put myself in timeout so that I could get over myself.  Once it was time to leave for the park (the boys had football practice) I got myself completely prepared for a run even though I was still trying to back out.  As soon as we parked the car I made myself hey out and go.  No chatting with anyone because that might give the the excuse I was looking for.  So, I got out of the car and headed off into the humid, wet weather. I slowly made my way through 3 (slow) miles.

Tonight I was stronger than my excuses.

1 month weigh-in/check-in

Hmmm.  Honestly, one month ago I thought I’d be a little further along at the 1 month mark, but I also thought that I’d be able to go 100% back to the “old me” in no time.  There’s been some good and there’s been some bad this month.  I will say that I’m far from the person I was a month ago, but I’m also far from the person that I’m trying to rediscover.

We’ll talk about the bad first so that I can end this thing on a high note.  ;)

The BAD:

  • I’m having a hard time with limiting my social drinking.  I’ve eliminated 90% of my drinking through the week (I mean c’mon a stressful day sometimes requires a little bit of alcohol), but weekends and football and friends get me every time.  In the setting it’s so easy for 1 to turn to 2 to turn to 3 and before I know it I’ve used all my “extra” calories in one night AND I’m bloated for 4 days.  Not to mention my “food filter” seems to quit working and I tend to snack (and snack and snack).  I’m working on it, but it’s by far my biggest struggle and really the only BAD of the month.

The GOOD:

  • Despite the BAD, I’m still down 5 pounds this month.  Not where I pictured myself being, but at least for the first time this year the scale is moving DOWN.
  • I’m exercising semi-regularly again.  At least 3 days a week but I try for 4-5 days a week.  I bought a Polar HRM earlier this year and I try to burn at least 400-500 calories during each workout.  Lately I’ve mostly been walking and RUNNING, but I need to get better about getting in at least a little bit of strength training.
  • I’m doing good (not great) with my food tracking.  There’s been a few days (um…remember those nights with friends??) that I’ve just left alone after lunch.
  • I’m doing (mostly) better with my food choices and portions.  I’m not overfilling myself when something is reeeaaallly good (like I’d gotten back into the habit of doing) and am making smarter choices again overall.

So, since there are several more items in the GOOD category than in the BAD I’m going to call this month a WIN.  Going into month 2 I’m going to really work on getting better with my social drinking.  I think that will make a huge difference in the scale over the next month.

Week 3 Check In

I’m a little late checking in this week.  It’s not really because of any particular reason other than it’s just been a hectic week already.

I didn’t weigh in this week.  I was going to, but I knew the scale was going to be up again.  I haven’t eaten poorly, but last week after proclaiming that “nothing was going to stop me”, well… let’s just say something did.

Last Tuesday I woke up with my left hip feeling tight.  Later that evening I tried to stretch it and get it to pop (this happens from time to time and I can usually “fix it” myself).  Well, I threw out my back.  I never really knew what that saying meant until last week.  Until Friday I could barely move, and the thought of exercising was laughable.  Thankfully, Friday evening I got some relief while I was stretching and my back popped back into place.  My left hip was still tight and painful though, but at least I could move.  I really should have just went to the chiropractor, but who has time for that?!  So, I continued to do some stretching, but nothing crazy because I didn’t want to be incapacitated again.  I woke up yesterday morning, finally, pain free.

I did well with my eating and calorie counting during my week of misery.  But then my “visitor” arrived and as usual I retained a ridiculous amount of water.  So, when Monday came I said NO to the scale.  I didn’t need anything else at that point to make me feel like I was already hitting a “set back”.  I’ll weigh in next week after my water retention has subsided, and after I’ve had a week of being able to workout again.

I may be a little late checking in next week as well due to the fact that Monday I’ll be having an outpatient procedure (uterine ablation).

Week 2 Weigh In/Check In

This week’s weigh-in went almost exactly the way I thought it would.  This morning the scale read 192.6.  Yep, that’s a gain of 2.2 pounds.  I’m not freaking out though, and I’ll tell you why…

#1) I exercised 4 days last week, burning over 500 calories with each workout and I even ran almost 10 miles.

#2) I tracked my food intake and I know that those 2.2 pounds are not actual weight, but just water retention.

I can attribute the water retention to 2 things.  Alcohol intake and “that time” is nearly here.

I had a really good week with water intake (a gallon almost every day) and with calorie intake.  This weekend, however, was my husband’s birthday as well as a Holiday weekend.  So, I enjoyed more alcoholic beverages than I probably should have and didn’t eat the most nutritionally sound meals.  Because of this, though, I made sure to limit the amount of food that I ate.  Like I said, I’ve tracked my calories throughout the weekend (even the bad ones) and I know that I didn’t eat (or drink) enough to gain any significant weight.

So, this week I’m back at it with no road blocks in sight.  And if a road block happens to appear…

It ain’t stopping me!!

Also, if anyone is interested I have started a DietBet.  Today is the first day, but there is still time to join!  Lose 4% in 4 weeks and win part of the $560 (+) pot!

Week 1 Weigh-In

Today marks one week of being back in the groove.  Overall, it was a good week.  Nearly great even.  I exercised 5 days last week for at least 40 minutes each time.  Most of it was walking, but there was some running and strength training thrown in for good measure.  I tracked my food everyday.  I drank at least 96 oz of water every day.

Saturday night we went to dinner for my 14 year old son’s birthday.  He chose Hooters (shocker, right?!). I debated on getting what I should get and getting what I wanted to get.  I decided that since it was a restaurant that we don’t frequent often that I would get what I wanted (Daytona Beach style wings) since I can’t get it anywhere else.  I got a side salad as my side.  I did make sure to get in some exercise Saturday morning and I knew that I would exercise the next day as well.  So, I decided not to feel bad about my choice and to just enjoy the evening with friends and family.

And you know what?!  I did enjoy my evening, I have no regrets about my choices, and I’m still just as committed and motivated as I was before we went to dinner.  I’m trying to make sure that this time around I don’t let myself get so bent of shape and obsessed with things.

Anyway, so this morning I stepped on the scale and saw 190.4.  Yep, that’s a 6.2 pound weight loss in my first week!  I know that it won’t continue at that pace, but I feel like I’m off to a good start.  My plan…keep doing what I’ve been doing.

Feeling like me again

It must be true what they say…

The first step to recovery is admitting that you have a problem.

Now, you’ve all seen the picture that I posted Monday.  It’s not like I was hiding the fact that I’d gained weight from anyone.  It’s very obvious.  However, that didn’t stop me from denying to myself that it was THAT obvious.  If I didn’t admit that I had gained weight then it certainly couldn’t be 100% true.  Right?!  WRONG!

Over the last month I’ve noticed the growing feeling of being done.  Done being lazy.  Done making excuses. Done eating and drinking without regard. Done watching the scale go up and up and up.  DONE.  I’d make a half-hearted attempt to “get it together” that would last all of 3 days and then I’d fall back into the same pattern that I’ve been following all year long.  I don’t know what it was about last Saturday.  Maybe it was the fact that it was my birthday.  Maybe it was the picture.  Maybe it was the fact that the scale read 196.6.  Maybe it was all of that.  I don’t know, but I did know that I was done. It’s the same feeling I had back in 2009.  I just knew it was time.

People have asked me if I’m okay.  I’m FINE!  Weight fluctuates.  It happens and it is what it is.  While I don’t like being back in this situation I can honestly say that I will not beat myself up about it.  I feel like this is just another path that I was supposed to take in my life.

Despite the number on the scale I feel like “me”, and I haven’t felt like that in more than a year.  Even when I was running 1000 miles last year and was sitting at my happy weight I didn’t feel like me.  Right now I’m in a good place emotionally and mentally and I’d rather be there and needing to lose some weight than where I was last year.